Encouragement is an important parenting is the idea for this post actually came to us during a road trip. While the kids were happily occupied, my husband and I started brainstorming a list of ways to be a good parent from A to Z. We scribbled our thoughts on the back of a Starbucks bag, and I’m only now getting the chance to share them with you. I’m sure there are countless other ideas that could be added, and I’d love to hear your suggestions as well. Also, I want to be clear— is challenging, and I fall short on many of these points more often than I’d like to admit. Even though this post is called “How to Be a Good Parent from A to Z,” remember that it’s possible to be a loving, capable parent and still make mistakes in these areas. None of us are perfect, but these are qualities I aim for and hope our parenting reflects.
Accountability – I’m grateful for the friends who keep me on track. Having at least one person in your life who will challenge you, ask thoughtful questions, speak truth kindly, and offer Encouragement is an important parenting can make a huge difference. Avoid surrounding yourself only with people who agree with everything you say. Look for those who care enough to nudge you toward growth.
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Biblical – I realize not everyone shares my faith, and I respect that. But here’s the idea: we want our Encouragement is an important parenting to reflect the heart of the gospel. That means acknowledging we’re imperfect, making mistakes again and again, yet offering our children the same love and grace we’ve received. This isn’t about earning favor, but about cultivating a relationship built on love that guides them toward what’s good and right.
Consistency – Children thrive when life feels predictable. They need stability in your relationship with them, regular patterns in daily life, and steady discipline. They should clearly understand your expectations and the results of their choices — and they need to see you follow through.
Discipline – While some see discipline as harsh, it’s actually a form of care. In Brain Rules for Babies by John Medina, research points to the “authoritative and responsive” style as most effective — involved parents who set high standards for behavior and maturity while staying engaged. Discipline, when done with love and fairness, helps shape responsible, capable adults.
Emancipation – We can’t cling to our children forever. Our mission is to prepare them for independence. Picture a graph where “control” decreases as “age” increases — slowly, steadily, and in step with their ability to handle responsibility. Too much control can stunt growth, while too little too soon can create problems as well.
Accountability – I can’t picture raising kids without friends who help me stay grounded. Even a single friend who isn’t afraid to ask hard questions, speak truth kindly, extend grace, and cheer you on can make a huge impact. Choose companions who will lovingly push you to grow, not just nod along with everything you say.
Biblical – I realize not everyone shares this belief, and that’s perfectly fine. My point is this: whether or not faith is your foundation, the core is about showing unconditional love and grace. We’ll make mistakes—Encouragement is an important parenting plenty of them—but just like a loving Father invites us into relationship, we can welcome our children with forgiveness and guidance that comes from love, not from trying to earn acceptance.
Consistency – Kids flourish when life feels steady. They need trustworthy relationships, predictable rhythms, and reliable consequences. They should be able to count on your words and actions matching, and know that your expectations don’t constantly shift.
Discipline – While the Encouragement is an important parenting word can sound harsh, true discipline is a gift. John Medina’s Brain Rules for Babies highlights the “Authoritative and Responsive” style—high engagement combined with high expectations. This balance fosters maturity and self-control, both of which are crucial for adult life.
Emancipation – The end goal is to raise children who can live confidently on their own. Picture a chart: “control” on the vertical axis, “age” on the horizontal—the line should slope toward independence. Letting go gradually as your child demonstrates responsibility prevents both overprotection and premature abandonment.
Flexibility – I once believed Encouragement is an important parenting all mapped out—until my kids’ personalities proved me wrong. There’s no single strategy that works for everyone. We need to get to know each child, try different approaches, and make changes when needed. Stubbornly sticking to one method can keep us from moving forward.
Grace – God has poured out amazing grace on us, and we should pass it along to our children. Rather than focusing solely on producing “good” behavior, we aim to connect with their hearts. Give Them Grace offers a rich look at this mindset, showing a fresh way to speak to and guide kids.
Humor – Parenting goes better with a healthy supply of laughter. Children can be unpredictable, messy, and wonderfully strange. You might encounter marbles in noses or see every stuffed animal lined up for a “bath.” Even odd comments (“I wish I was a skunk so I could spray you”) are easier to handle when you can laugh.
Intentionality – I began Meaningful Mama because I didn’t want to just survive the days—I wanted to live them with purpose. Encouragement is an important parenting means showing up, keeping your focus, and deliberately working toward your values instead of letting busyness or fatigue take the lead.
Joy – Honestly, there have been seasons where I’ve felt like parenting has taken away some of my happiness. I even wrote a piece titled, “I Have Everything I Ever Wanted, So Why Do I Feel So Empty?” to unpack those feelings. True joy doesn’t come from raising children, having a career, or being married. It comes from the Lord. I have to keep returning to Him, shifting my mindset, and choosing to adjust my outlook so I can experience joy more completely.
Kitchen – The kitchen is at the heart of so much family life. Shared meals truly matter. It’s where people naturally gather, connect, and nourish both body and spirit. That’s why Meaningful Mama shares a recipe collection full of my favorites and encourages getting kids involved in cooking and baking. This central spot holds countless opportunities for learning and relationship-building. According to The Family Dinner Project, sitting down together for meals produces results we all hope for in our children: “reduced rates of substance abuse, teen pregnancy, and depression, along with higher GPAs and stronger self-esteem. Research also shows that conversation during dinner boosts vocabulary more than reading, and the stories exchanged at the table help children develop resilience. On top of all that, consistent family meals lower the chances of obesity and eating disorders in both kids and teens.” Let’s bring our families back to the kitchen to enjoy this time together.
Love – What is love? In Scripture, agape love refers to a selfless, sacrificial, and unconditional love — the highest form among the four types described in the Bible. 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a tells us, “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not proud or rude. It does not demand its own way; it is not easily angered or resentful. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.” Living this out is far easier to talk about than to practice — especially in parenting. Yet, it’s a goal we continually strive toward.
Modeling – The phrase “Do as I say, not as I do” doesn’t work with children. They imitate what they see. Have you ever noticed your own weaknesses — like impatience or irritability — showing up in them? Our tone, our words, and our actions set the pattern they’ll follow. They absorb our habits, for better or worse.
Noticing – As parents, we need to stay attentive. Pay attention to shifts in your child’s mood or behavior. Look deeper to understand what’s driving their feelings and how you can best support them. Observe how they respond to correction, encouragement, and affirmation. Learn their love language. Recognize their interests and nurture those passions. When children feel truly known and understood, it speaks deeply to their hearts.
Optimism – Optimism is a wonderful trait to demonstrate for children. It teaches them that no matter what challenges life brings, they can focus on the bright side and turn setbacks into opportunities. For parents, optimism provides a healthy perspective on the parenting journey. It helps you notice and appreciate the good qualities in your child, which strengthens their confidence and positive view of the world.
Patience – If I had to choose one of these traits that I need the most, it would be this one. A strong parent is patient. Does that mean I’m not a good parent? Not at all—but I’ll admit it’s an area I’m still improving. I like to think that trying to improve is also a sign of a good parent. Parenting demands patience. It’s needed when teaching the same lessons over and over again. Kids are learning everything for the first time, which means there will be endless messes to clean, repeated teaching moments, emotional outbursts, mischief, and a noise level that might exceed anything you’ve experienced before… at least, that’s the case with my kids. Let’s work together on developing this essential quality.
Quiet – Does this sound contradictory? We’ve already established my kids are anything but quiet. Before becoming a parent, I saw myself as an extrovert. But after having children, I craved solitude and calm more than ever. Writing has become part of my personal outlet—it gives me space to think and be creative. Quiet moments allow you to simply exist without distraction. They create room for prayer, meditation, or reading. Silence is how you recharge. Where do you find your quiet moments? I’m naturally a night owl, so I stay up later than I probably should. You might prefer early mornings to catch the sunrise. Or maybe setting aside time midday—during naps or designated quiet time—works for you. However you find it, I believe carving out stillness will make you a stronger, more present parent.




